Breakfast of Champions

1. Pentasa. For Crohn’s Disease. I’m supposed to take four of these four times a day, but I usually don’t remember to. Really saves on the underwear.
2. Calcium. To help prevent bone loss from all the Prednisone I’ve taken over the years for Crohn’s. I’m still getting more bow-legged by the minute.
3. Ibuprophen. Optional for my aching knees, required on tennis days and days after tennis.
4. Glucosomine. In an attempt to stave off inevitable artificial knees.
5. Prilosec. The little purple pill. For GERD, which is heartburn squared.
6. Multi Vitamin.
7. Vitamin B. Not sure why I take this one.

And do you know what? I can swallow them all at once.

I take the anti-depressant at night.

I played tennis with Q, the fifteen year old yesterday. She doesn’t have L’s all around game yet, isn’t as aggressive or accurate as the elegant murderer that L has become, but doggies, she can hit the ball hard. She has a big looping stroke from both sides. I love that sound, when someone hits a tennis ball on the sweet spot. It almost sounds like a gunshot. We played a set. She served first and won. I didn’t want to demoralize her with my big serve so I wasn’t really trying to bring it on my first serve. As old and slow as I am, I still try to come in behind my serve. I saw a lot of balls whizzing past me and landing a few inches in. She was hitting everything hard and deep, forcing me to either retreat or hurry my stroke. She went up three one and I decided I wasn’t going to let her beat me. I started trying to blow her away with my serves. Although I aced her a few times and won most of my service games, some of my best rips were coming back at me. I couldn’t break her serve and ended up losing 6-3. It’s not the first time she’s beaten me, but the first time I thought it was a fluke. This was no fluke. I may never be able to beat her again. I was having a bad knee day though. Maybe…..

9 thoughts on “

  1. Hot damn!  That’s a lotta pills.  I also do a multivite, B-complex, glucosamine, zinc and something else.
    One thing that really helped my reflux was a) not overeating and b) maintaining good posture.  I was becoming too dependent on zantac, et al for reflux and was suffering too much, when I tried simply sitting up straight.  It worked!  No more pills, except when it gets really, really bad (usu. a result of overindulgence or spicy foods).

  2. dude, where’s all the fun drugs?  anyone who can swallow 7 pills at once should really be having a better time than you are. 

  3. The fact that you can swallow all that at once interests me the most.  Not in a sexual way, mind you.  Well, maybe if I tried. I have trouble swallowing 2 Advil. One always likes to somehow avoid the gulp of water washing down my throat and sits there on my tongue, mocking me.

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